“The body never lies,” said Martha Graham, world famous dancer and choreographer. She was not only talking about dancers but all human beings in general. The human body’s gestures, posture and mannerisms is the manifestation of the feelings and attitudes of the person.
This is especially important to remember when dating. Men and women can quietly learn all they need to know about their date just by paying attention to their date’s body language. Crossed arms are one of the biggest indicators of a closed-off and defensive person.
This doesn’t mean that a person is bad or not to be trusted just because his or her arms are crossed. Also, be sure to take into consideration that a scantily dressed woman may simply be cold and is crossing her arms to retain body heat. However, if your date continually crosses his or her arms during conversation, this may be an early warning sign of an impending doomed relationship.
Crossed arms have long been considered a negative response towards other people. Parents tell their children to uncross their arms when the child is being punished because it is an act of defiance. Teachers have instructed students to break the habit of crossing their arms while in class so that their brains are more open to receive.
It does not take psychologist to interpret this behavior in others. Anyone with basic observational skills can see that crossed arms indicate a lack of openness. Such observational skills must be brought in and even heightened during dates. Noticing that your date has a basic body habit of crossing his or her arms is a good excuse-albeit an unspoken excuse-to not make a second date.
According to leading psychologists and therapists, a person with a habitual mannerism that includes crossing his or her arms, the following emotions are consistently present in this person:
• Self protection/preservation
• Fear of being exposed
It is crucial to be aware of your own body language. If you are on a wonderful date and you want to make the best impression possible, be careful to not habitually cross your arms. Body language is a two-way street. People mirror each other during conversations. You can experiment with this by assuming certain body poses or arm poses while talking to another person. Notice how that person will imitate you without realizing he or she is doing so.
Speaking of how body language lies in our sub conscience, remember that body language signals are communicated subconsciously. If you cross your arms often, your date will not immediately make the connection between your crossed arms and your closed-off emotional state. Your date is much more likely to be slightly uncomfortable and tense in your presence.
Have fun and play around with the power of body language while on dates. Pay attention to how other people stand or sit and how you feel in their presence. Doing so may save you from many a future bad date.